Category: first date advice

Put simply, dating can be hard work. There are lots of things that are really worthwhile yet there are others that you simply can’t stand. So following is our list compiled by some of our singles through feedback we get that they really hate about dating. Obviously, we are here to help you get over these hurdles but some things about dating definitely remain a constant.

1) Coming on Too Heavy

Never tell your new partner that you love them on the second date. Don’t ever be too pushy as this is a real turn off. Have some distance and keep them guessing about your feelings, at least for the first couple of weeks. Being too pushy is one of the things most people hate about dating. Also, don’t over SMS or text them too much. Keep some distance and space.

2) Not willing to travel
If your meeting a new person for the first time, be prepared to leave your local area or comfort zone. If your in Sydney and you live in the East be prepared to meet them for a coffee in Manly. If your in Melbourne, same goes. If you are stubborn about this it does set a negative precedent.

3) Be flirty over the phone
A real turn off is when someone does not communicate effectively. Remember if your chatting with them for the first time, try to have a bit of a spark in your voice. You are going to be judged by this and it will set the tone for your first meeting. People hate it when the other person at the end of the phone gives short, sharp answers.

4) Raving on about your ex
Don’t bring up your ex too much. If your still in love with them forget about going on the date. If you hate them don’t bag them too much or put them down in front of the other [person. It just makes you look malicious and nasty. People really hate this type of chatter about the ex. You may say how long your were in the relationship but leave it at that.

5) Being rude to the waiters
Oh, this is such a turn off and it’s going to put your partner off in 2 seconds. Shouting, yelling ort swearing is NOT a good look and only paints a bad picture of you in the future. If the service or food is bad try to make a light joke out of it. Never ever take it too seriously unless they complain in the first instance. Then and only then can you chime in – but keep your temper well under control.

6) Always right
Being on a date is getting to know the other person. Don’t push your opinions too much Try to listen to what the other person is saying and if you feel they are wrong about something you don’t have to be argumentative about it or have a strong opinion. Try to be as neutral as possible on the first couple of dates.

7) Overly sexual
Don’t go on about your fantasies or what you would like to do to her or him on a tropical island. This is not ideal for a first meet and greet. Save it for much later.

8) Being scared of a relationship

Let’s face it, if your on the first date because you have been introduced to someone through Executive Match, then you are most likely looking for a long term relationship. Never say you are not. Most people going on a date are genuine about their commitment and so should you be. If you give the impression that this is a one night stand or a fling then it will not go past the first date.

9) Being late and looking tardy
Two date killers and a real turn off. Being late (without letting them know) and looking as though you have just come from the gym. If your stuck in traffic or the kids have held you up please let the other party know. Being late shows a lack of respect and sets you up for failure. Punctuality is key to a first date.

10) Turn off your mobile phone
Technology is a great thing but for your first date I’m afraid that it has to be turned off. Full concentration must be given to the other person. I know you might want to let someone know your Ok but save that for the toilet break if you really have to use your phone

There are just a few dating tips to help you survive your first meeting. If you can survive your first date and you have both enjoyed yourselves then the future is looking bright and your well on your way to your second date.

If you have just been divorced or are recently single and you are new to the dating scene then following are 7 things you definitely do not want to do on a first date. Break these rules and it could get uncomfortable for you.

#1: Go to the movies. This is a killer as your sitting next to a complete stranger in total silence. The idea of a first date is to get to know someone. The only way to do this is meet for a coffee of a drink and spend some quality time getting to know them.

Sitting in a cinema is just going to be odd and uncomfortable. If you’re a movie buff and you are keen to see a new flick, then go with a mate or a relative or even go on your own. You might think it’s a good idea but wait till you are on your 4^th or even 5^th date before you hit the movies together. There are so many things wrong about movies on a first date that they are too numerous to mention. So take our advice and avoid this completely for the immediate future.

# 2: Go to the beach for a swim. OMG, this is not a good idea especially as so many people are very self conscious about their bodies. The last thing they want to be doing is peeling off all their clothes in front of you and heading off for a swim. Keep the beach for later when you both know each other a little better.

# 3: Hear off to a yoga class together. Again, like the beach any physical activity should be left till much later when you are more align with each other. Plus, like the movies, you want to be in an environment where you can talk to each other and get to know one another. A yoga class requires silence and this is not what a first date should be about.

# 4: Don’t get too drunk on the first date. Avoid drinking lot’s of alcohol as this can send some really bad signals. Sure, you may be nervous and yes a couple of wines will help calm you down, but leave it at that – no more! Slurring, over passionate first dates are such an ugly look. It may be hard to stick to this but you have to try it. You will be amazed by the positive impression you will make by staying sober. Guys, if your reading this take note! Stop at a couple of drinks…leave it at that. If your too drunk your going to try things you’ll regret especially if you like her. Control here is the key and you will be in a much better position on your next meeting, rather than having to apologise for your bad behaviour (that’s if you get a second date).

# 5: Don’t expect to sleep with the other person on the first date. There may be some expectations about this, especially from the guys side of things but this is a definite NO NO. This first date is all about getting to know the person and seeing if your compatible. That’s all it’s about and nothing more. Yes you may have a kiss on the cheek at the end but leave it at that.

# 6: Don’t be late. Yes it’s fashionable to be a couple of minutes late but anything over 10 minutes is just plain rude. If your stuck in traffic and this can be common in Sydney or Melbourne or your a busy single executive professional stuck in a meeting, SMS them to let them know your running late. Be polite and say your so sorry when you first meet. This will diffuse any tension from the party that’s been sitting there waiting for you.

# 7: Don’t turn up without any money and expect the other person to pay. Pay your share and if the other party insists they pay make sure you have offered.

These are some golden first date rules. Follow these, make the right impression and you will be well onto your second date.

If you are going on your first date and are feeling nervous you are not alone. This is really common and probably the best advice the team here at Executive Match can give you is do not panic. I know it’s hard and you are probably dreading it but remember the person you are meeting is going to be a bit nervous as well. So following are some tips and tricks to help you relax before your big first date.

#1: Try to deep breath. Relax and try to visualise something calm. Get your head space into a place where you feel comfortable. Try to visualise this while slowly breathing in and out. Do this for a couple of minutes before you meet. You will be amazed by what a simple breathing exercise can do for your state of mind and nerves.

# 2: Basically, don’t over think it. Just treat it as having a bit of fun and do not take it too seriously. This is not life or death. You are just meeting a person, who like you has joined a matchmaking agency and is looking for the same thing. You are both on the same page so take control and have some fun.

# 3: Avoid lot’s of caffeine before you meet. This could make you jittery and over anxious. Try drinking some tea instead.

# 4: If your freaking out and don’t think you can go through with it ( perhaps this is your first date or first time doing something like this), try going to the gym beforehand for a work out. This will relieve some of the tension and put you in a more calm state.

# 5: Sleep well the night before. Try not to have a big night so you arrive at the date hung over. This is not a good look and you will probably not be looking your best.

# 6: I know this is a bit ‘stalker’ like but if you have their number do a bit of a Google search to find out a bit about them. Check out their LinkedIn profile and see where they have worked. If you feel that you are going to be stuck for conversation tell them directly that you looked them up on social media and perhaps talk about their past jobs. They will appreciate your honesty and perhaps find you a bit more interesting that you have gone to all the effort to find out more about them.

# 7: Wear deodorant! If your nervous you are going to sweat. Make sure your under arms are fully sprayed with a deodorant. You do not want to start smelling bad – this will only make matters worse as you start to worry about your body odour as well. Wear some perfume or aftershave as well.

# 8: If none of this is working and you are a complete mess before meeting the potential future love of your life then there is one last thing that you can do; drink. Yes, not recommended to get totally sloshed on your first date, but a glass of wine or a beer will do wonders in calming those first date jitters. There’s nothing wrong with this and most people expect you to be nervous so go on and order a drink. What ever you do, never over do it and hit it hard. Not ideal for making appositive first impression.

So follow these helpful tips to calm you down before the date. Remember, you are here to have fun so treat it that way.

A first date can be one of the most intimidating things we face as human beings, a mad mixture of formidable apprehension, overwhelming excitement, and butterflies on the loose in your stomach, mild headaches, and breathlessness, to mild nausea and back again. Whatever your physical response and mental state, a first date can be nerve-wracking to say the very least. Things that we normally do on a daily basis suddenly become near impossible such as choosing what to wear, thinking of something witty to say, or just being your normal humorous and easy going self.
Make sure you focus on be as normal as possible, following your normal routine as if you were getting ready to go to work, have a shower get dressed and be on time. Do a little research on the venue if it’s a restaurant, dress accordingly and put some careful thought into what you order from the menu and no matter what, remember everything from conversation to consumption should be in moderation. Here’s a list in order of the most important things “NOT TO DO” on your first date. Follow these dating rules and your on a winner on your first date.

1. DON’T BE LATE
It doesn’t matter how good your excuse is, there is simply no excuse for being late, especially on your first date and if you’re lucky enough get a second date you will never be able to live that first date mistake down. Moreover, this is a display of not caring, and sends a message that your time is more important than your date’s time, leave home or work early, and allow some extra time to make sure your punctual.

2. DON’T FORGET TO SHOWER
Some people can get into such a tizz that they forget to bathe and attend to their normal grooming regime. The five senses play an important role here and if you come across as being in anyway smelly or emitting unpleasant body odours then the chance of a second date are probably pretty slim.

3. DON’T GET DRUNK
You might be a tad nervous but don’t use that as an excuse to write yourself off in an attempt to get the better of your nerves. No one likes to hear you slurring your words, burping and apologising for your actions because you were a little nervous. Remember first impressions count so try and keep things tidy.

4. DON’T BRING A FRIEND
This is possibly one of the worst things you could do, it tells your date that you are completely incompetent, have no confidence whatsoever and can’t make your own decisions or assessments; you are governed by your friends. It will undoubtedly make your date that is probably equally as nervous, feel very uncomfortable.

5. DON’T CHECK YOUR PHONE
This is your first date and if there was ever a time to display undivided attention to anyone or anything, it’s right now. In fact in this circumstance its best to turn your phone off and leave it in your bag or car or even at home. They should pick up on this given the overuse of these maddening devices and you may just get a few extra brownie points.

6. DON’T DISCUSS PAST RELATIONSHIPS
This is a huge no-no and will scare the pants off your date, they are probably trying to forget about their last partner and that’s why they’re on a date with you, to help them forget. And if you start talking about your past relationships it might mean to them that you’re still in love with one or more of your past partners.

7. DON’T TALK ABOUT MARRIAGE
It’s your first date, don’t be like a bull at a gate. You need to get to learn about each other and not come across as some desperate weirdo who thinks he’s Errol Flynn on a self confessed love escapade. Leave the marriage and baby talk discussions for a much later date.

8. DON’T TALK ABOUT SEX
You may think your god’s gift to women or the next Joan Collins of your generation but bringing up the topic of sex is a big mistake, generally. This subject is best left alone as it can be a sensitive subject for some, anyway there will be plenty of time for a roll in the hay down the track.

9. DON’T REVEAL PERSONAL FAMILY INFORMATION
This date all about you and your better getting to know each other, not about your mothers amazing fruit cake or the gold medal your dad won at the 1968 winter Olympics. Should this first date explode into a full blown love affair then by all means disclose more about your family and its history.

10. DON’T ORDER THE WRONG FOOD
You have already spent enough time preparing yourself to make a good impression, maybe you have a perfectly pressed white shirt or blouse on, so the last thing you want to do is splatter and spray it with bolognaise sauce or honey infused chicken wing dipping sauce. And if you’re not a master with chopsticks then maybe request a fork.

So you have decided to stop wasting your valuable time and engage the services of a professional Matchmaking Agency. Hopefully you have done a little bit of research on the agency and or been referred by friends or family. A reputable and professional agency should have given you some coaching to bring your image up to scratch, giving you the added confidence for an enjoyable and successful first encounter. Beyond all that, here are a few simple tips that you should try to impress into your image while playing the dating game. These tips can be used in both the interview process with dating agency when they need to find out more information about you, to make sure they pair you with the most suitable candidates and also when you’re out on that nerve racking first date!!

First of all it’s paramount that you make yourself likeable. As human beings we seek the accolades, adoration and praises of our friends, families and peers, in general we like to be liked. Just as is commonly the case in business, we as employees, managers or maybe company directors, much prefer to engage in business with people that we like and trust. Likability comes through knowing someone, spending time with them and building mutual confidence and trust.

In a dating scenario we can often make a judgment as to whether we like someone or not within just a few short minutes. Try to show empathy to your date and make them know you are just like them in some ways, maybe referring to the difficulty of the whole dating process. Here you are taking sides with your date in a battle against what is a mutual enemy, pay particular attention to what he or she dislikes, it may be a topic referring to the environment or preferred political party or maybe just their favorite color, try to align your image to theirs based on their character traits.
Try to be pleasant and agreeable on topics they raise or any points of matter, show compassion and real interest, by doing this you will be displaying qualities that make you more likeable.

It’s also a plus if you can be a little unique when it comes to formatting your dating profile with your chosen dating agency. Make sure you provide a nice but more importantly current photo, don’t provide an older profile photo, maybe when you were a few pounds lighter, after all this will dissolve any trust which is what you are trying to build. And when it comes to telling your story don’t divulge every little detail as though you’re writing your own auto-biography, share enough of your own personal details but keep something for the date night. For instance you maybe you will not disclose some or all of your hobbies or maybe a community based charity that you are involved in, displaying a caring and generous side to your character that they were completely unaware of. Maybe you speak more than one language and you can tell your date they look beautiful or handsome in a second language, sure to be an interesting point to elaborate on and create an interesting conversation.

If you get stuck for conversation, relax take a breath and think about the things that are close to your heart, the things you most love doing and that have moldered you into the person you are today. These topics will be easier for you to talk about, as it comes from the heart and your date should pick up on this, showing to them you are transparent and real. Referring back to child memories and adventures of misfortune or mischief are often funny and real, we were all young once after all, this will bring out the human side you.

Whatever you do don’t confess your deepest, darkest secrets on your first or for that matter, even fifth date. It’s ok to reveal something private that only you and maybe a few close to you know about you. This should help to add a little spice to things and make your date more curious about you, but in a good way. And it won’t hurt to say things that others may not have the gusto to do, without going overboard, this will help you to stand out from the crowd, making you the date that was unique and different, ultimately this will make you memorable to the person whose heart you are trying to capture